Tsar Alexei (1650) – The first in a long line of badasses

He creates the first law code in Russia in response to some rebellions and riots

Those who broke this law code were either tortured, beaten, or killed.
– or sometimes all three! Alexei you little rascal!!

This law code solidifies the power of the ruling elite in Russia
-for example peasants (serfs) can’t even leave their land without permission
• someone please explain to me again how these people are not slaves

Anyway, Alexei ends up marrying twice
– his first wife passed away :(

This creates and issue with royal succession because there are now two family clans who have claim to it: the children from Alexei’s first wife and those from his second.
– these are known as the Naryshkins and the Miroslavskis.
• Russian people have the best names

This of course creates an unbelievable shitstorm of problems about who gets the throne
– but we will get to that another day
• like, tomorrow probably

Alexei tries to expand Russia’s territory during his reign by colonizing Siberia for resources

It should be noted that Sibera is a godawful place to live. This is important to know because later tsars exile people there constantly
– usually for like, no reason at all
• it’s very silly but also a little hilarious

Ok so anyway the elite class right under the tsar are either talented, smart people who worked their way there, or just lazy dumb assholes from prominent families who got there by just being born.
– their only real job is to live (mooch) off their serfs, so it’s in their best interested to keep the tsar (who made laws keeping the serfs in line) in power.

Mestnichestvo – the system that determines which family is more important than the other. It has to do with how long your family has been serving the tsar
– also is super hard to pronounce

The tsar owns literally everything, and he got this power from God!
-this keeps a lot of people from trying to mess with him, because messin with the tsar is kiiiind of like messin with God

But the tsar only really has like two responsibilities:
1. Ruling Russia
2. Producing a suitable heir to the throne.

Doesn’t seem too hard, but many tsars find a way to make this soooo difficultttt ugh.

For example before Alexei was in charge was an era called “The Time of Troubles”
-Ivan the Terrible murders his own son like a huge douche, leaving no one to succeed him

So it’s just a giant pile of civil war and foreign invasion and marks the absolute end of the original Kiev bloodline
-Kiev being that totally sweet city the Mongols took over
-thanks a lot, Ivan.

To solve this stupid issue that Ivan created, the leading elite get together in a land council and elect a new tsar
– that’s awfully democratic of you, Russia!
– what is a land council? I have no idea.

They pick a Romanov named Michael, and this begins the Romanov dynasty and allows the country to begin to rebuild
PS – Alexei is Michael’s son!

This information would have probably been more contextually relevant at the beginning of class. Oh well. Chronology is for dorks I guess

BACK TO 1650! The patriarch of the church is a guy named Nikon and he and Alexei are like besties.

Nikon thinks that perhaps some of their religious texts have been corrupted through being re-copied over the years
-So he invites the Greeks over for a slumber party to compare notes on their original texts!

Nikon was right and they actually discover some differences.

So Nikon is like hey guys we should fix our texts to match the original doctrine of the church
– some people are like hell yea nikon you are a god damn genius
– but some other people are like shut up nikon that’s the worst idea ever

Considering the population is split almost evenly on the issue, it’s a huge controversy!
– at the same time a plague breaks out in Moscow and many people believe it’s divine wrath for their church reforms
– pretty sure God probably has better stuff to do, but okay
• and actually it’s because this is like 1650 and personal hygiene doesn’t exist yet, but yeah okay divine wrath it is!!

So now there are two religious groups in Russia, those who are into the revisions Nikon made and the “Old Believers” who don’t want to change.

This is super important later in Russia but now class is totally over so I’m goin to lunch
– butternut squash soup what whaaat

Day One – Super Early Russia Time!!
Day Two – Russian People Murder Each Other Like Way Too Often
Day Three – Peter the Motherfucking Great
Day Four – Russia Picks Some Fights for Shits and Giggles
Day Five – Drunken Caroling as a Form of Government

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